Friday, December 31, 2004

All die Elend dieser Welt | An der Ende eines Jahres...

Hallo ihr alle da draussen...have you heard? The earthquake off the shores of Sumatra, known as the worst quake since Anchorage, Alaska in the '60s...a quake which generated tsunamis and tidal waves which struck Phuket, Sumatra, wiped out part of the Nicobar Islands, Sri Lanka, India, and even reaching the shores of Africa. The current death toll stands at 80 000 and is expected to rise. Suffering is everywhere to see, really. Just pick up a copy of your local newspaper. Husbands looking for lost wives. A man squats over the ruins of what was once his shelter and home. Photographs searching for missing people put up on notice boards in hospitals - people who are unlikely to come back alive again. People queueing for freshwater. Bodies rotting in the open because there simply aren't enough resources to do anything. A woman cries, 'Mein Mann ist tod. Ich weiss nicht, was ich jetzt tun soll.' Mass graves. Women mourning over lost children. A man who saw his 6-month-old daughter torn from his arms by a tidal wave.

But we've also seen how fast the world reacted. How in the militarily-contested area of Aceh, where government forces and rebels put aside their differences and focussed on the issue at hand. A C-130 full of medical supplies, food and doctors and relief crew waiting on the tarmacs. In this moment of extreme suffering, it really forces us to put aside our petty differences and look. Does humanity need constant reminders from Nature to band together? Why are we so individualistic?

And Mother Earth couldn't have found a better time to strike. On Boxing Day. At Phuket, a world-renowned holiday getaway. Sumatra, Sri Lanka, India, East Africa - areas suffering from poverty, military strife, and what more have you. Not that i could imagine it striking Los Angeles, that is. But that is the unpredictability of it - it strikes anywhere, anytime and there isn't anything you can do about it.

Me? I'm fine. We're all unscathed here in Singapore...carrying on with our mundane lives, worrying over trivialities. I myself worried so much about my marksmanship because i got it on the first day of practice, but i lost it at the test. Blame stoppages. They were my ultimate downfall. But did we even look in horror at what was happening around the world? Today Forest commented how unbelievable it sounded that 80 000 were estimated dead. I wasn't, but i found it shocking. How much has passed in just 4 days!

So my No.1 will not have that many adornments, i'm not that bothered too....commission can already. It's the end of a year - but what a way to end it! I got tons of old clothes. Think i'll just give them away lah...there are others could have used it. Every little helps, i hope...

Have you ever drank Southern Comfort? Take it mixed with grapefruit and raspberry juice...it tastes really like the juice...so there's a risk like Cointreau...you don't really taste the alcohol, you only feel the impact...which isn't really so good...it's kinda dangerous especially if people are mixing your drinks for you.

For the new year...i just want to be a good officer, travel a lot, and enjoy my NS liability. Time really flies. It's already been one bloody year. One more to go...then...ORD loh! hahaha. I really have to start saving up too. So i can afford a digital camera and yet live quite okay. And since the new year is coming around...happy birthday taryn!! =)

Do you listen to Nightwish? Think Within Temptation, or like Evanescence squared. Here's The Phantom of the Opera from their album, Century Child.

Nightwish - The Phantom of the Opera

In sleep he sang to me

in dreams he came
that voice which calls to me
and speaks my name

And do I dream again?
For now I find
the Phantom of the Opera is there
inside my mind

Sing once again with me
our strange duet
My power over you
grows stronger yet

And though you turn from me,
to glance behind,
the Phantom of the Opera is there
inside your mind

Those who have seen your face
draw back in fear
I am the mask you wear
It's me they hear

Your/my spirit and your/my voice,
in one combined:
the Phantom of the Opera is there
inside your/my mind

He's there, the Phantom of the Opera
Beware the Phantom of the Opera

In all your fantasies,
you always knew
that man and mystery
were both in you

And in this labyrinth,
where night is blind,
the Phantom of the Opera is there/here
inside your/my mind

Sing, my Angel of Music!

He's there, the Phantom of the Opera

Sunday, December 26, 2004

Scharfschützer zu werden | Was ich mich eigentlich frage

Hallo ihr alle da draussen...about to be going to book in in an hour's time or so...what's coming up next week? Apart from New Year (duh) and the supposed New Year's Eve bash...which i don't know if it will come through...because there's this big issue called food and i don't know how it will be resolved. I mean, given the current preparations, my house is better suited as a pubbing spot than for fooding...for all the alcoholics in the world (i do need Reuben to bring me reinforcements, though) - so i really hope this works out! Ween also asked if she should ask OAC along...i mean, why not? if they want to come, my doors are wide open! Everyone could use the opportunity to meet new people or catch up with others! Really.

Alex - Es ist wunderschön, etwas von dir zu hören...because we've been so out of touch...haha...one day i shall return and visit you! I hope...

I have live range for the next 3 days coming up...I hope my M16 doesn't IA. I hope to get my marksmanship. So i can have 200 more bucks to spend, and also have the crossed rifles on my No.1...i don't mind, really! haha.

As if anyone would, come to think of it...Marksmanship isn't really that impossible! Komm! Du schaffst es! Das Schiessen geht ganz einfach...22 von 28 und du wirst einen Scharfschützer...come on man!

To you: You know who you are...i think i wrote you your letter too early. What a surprise for Christmas, huh? I really don't know how to help you, even if i feel that i should...tell me how? You really should feel guilty, even if he's being plain unreasonable. Sometimes you should really listen to your inner star and be more affirmative, rather than crying yourself to sleep over the holidays. It's really not worth it to torture everyone like this. Sigh. Please do something...because it's your life and all i can do is give advice. I can't change you - that comes from within...

Sigh.

Saturday, December 25, 2004

Weihnachten zu Hause | Scheisse...

Hallo ihr alle da draussen...Anyway, Merry Christmas! This is the day...So did you all get many many presents? I didn't, really. Woke up late and idled around all day. Some people feel like i'm wasting a perfectly good public holiday (Kelvin: Why guilty? I'm not blaming anyone for my being at home...And it's no one's fault.) In fact, i quite enjoyed being at home. It's finally a stressless environment. I mean, when you go out, you do have fun, but there are times when you just want to sit back and relax, read a book, listen to good music...i wonder why some people term these as a wastage of time.

Anyway, i did quite a lot this Christmas! Went running (something i haven't done outside camp for like EONS) - about 7-8 klicks? Then also spent time reading, listening to Secret Garden, mailing Sam's letter, and also doing up my model!

But speaking of the model...i don't know but maybe i'll be having bad luck soon...broke a bottle of clear green paint! Now my feet are splattered with green and look disgusting. Not to mention the shattered glass and paint blobs i had to clear up...Bleargh...

But i don't want bad luck. I still want to get my marksmanship. Even if that seems totally impossible (and i totally agree too...) Sigh...

Next Friday there's gonna be a gathering at my place...ween wants to ask the OAC along...i got no issue with that...more the merrier la...Just don't tear my place apart can liao. Guys, if you read this, if many many pple come...bring more alcohol and more stuff to pass the time! I wonder what you can do. Watch movie and play mahjong, maybe? Then go out for late night chow...or just overnight...without doing anything...i don't know. But if you guys want to overnight...i don't mind crossing over to 2005 with all of you by my side. =)

Ein Weihnachten ganz ohne Geld und Geist | Ace!

Hallo ihr alle da draussen...Zuerst...Frohe Weihnachten! Und auch einen gute Rutsch ins neue Jahr dazu... Finally, Christmas is here! But for me, it's a Christmas without any money and without much spirit too. Sad man...But i'll tell you more later...Anyhow...i hope that all of you out there get tons and tons of presents and be really happy this Christmas...2004 is already drawing to a close...hope all of you don't have regrets! For me...a year with many regrets and pains, but also a year when i finally grew out of that old shell. OCS has done wonders. I think...hopefully it's for the real good...

Anyway, i shall not digress further on this. If not i'll end up ranting and raving about OCS, FAOCC and our inner stars/demons again. This has got to be the poorest Christmas ever. Goodness. Why? Because pre-BATTLE KING i already spent 500 bucks on the Ace...then i come back and spend another 200 bucks on a sword display case...this thing which i will put my sword in and show it off to the world la...and rightly so may i add. This is the culmination of 42 weeks of blood, sweat, shit and tears. Anyone who has been through this should deserve this sword - especially if you've survived. Although i do feel that there are some cocksters who certainly do not deserve this particular honour.

Also this is a Christmas without much Christmas cheer and spirit...Must be the thing about being in camp. There's almost zero cheer and spirit in Khatib Camp, especially the bloody School of Artillery...was für ein grausames Ort! Got to wake up at 0530...got to do area cleaning...got to do our chin-ups...The only thing related to Christmas probably was area cleaning. Because we were all frantically station-hopping to find a station which plays Christmas songs! From WKRZ to Class 95 to Gold to Power 98 to Perfect 10...you name it, we tried it. Too bad. Whenever you want desperately to hear a Christmas song, they never play it. Always have dumb advertisment breaks or DJ chatter.

Evil pricks, aren't they? Haha.

But today we did have the School of Arty Christmas celebration...at the pool...All the cadets had to play something...played the kayak polo as goalkeeper...Everyone said i played well. Hmm. Okay lah. It's not easy...but nor is it impossibly difficult...however, it must be said that capsizing as a keeper is something you should never let happen...and got to be active also...unlike other keepers who were essentially passive defence. Waiting for something nice to hit them.

Then we had the stupid area inspection again...booked out at 1300! Sian man. Half a day burned away.

Ace! There's cosmic bowling at the CHEVRONS as i speak...went down there for a quick hour of games too...And for some surprises. Guess what? I didn't need a glowing houseball anymore...The Ace glows...not just the engraving...the entire ball glows. So the Royal/Lime/Cherry became iridiscient hues of fluorescent reds, greens and blues...and it played well too...hit my first closed game! Score? 236. Woohoo! That's awesome, dude! Haha...one good thing which came from Christmas...never knew it would be this good...Shows improvement! I still have much to learn under John though. Hopefully one day i'll play well enough and score high enough...(yes you may call it pride.)

No money for Christmas! Sigh.

Sunday, December 19, 2004

Die Erinnerungen...

MILO: A starburst in the dark of night... Posted by Hello


Pre-SAFARI: Ready to move! Posted by Hello


The Gun Drill Team... Posted by Hello

Das 55/04 OCC/43.FAOCC-Gedächtnis Die längste Wochenende der Welt! Gedenken

Hallo ihr alle da draussen...So here i am sitting here about...1 month and 4 days from commissioning parade...thinking about all that's come to pass. Delta Wing. X-Ray Battery. BTACC. So much to say and so much to reflect on, so much to cherish and so much that we'll miss...I had a blast at Delta, the people were great...people like Yong Cong, Hongster, Chowster, Lik Man, and those who came over to arty with me...it's been a great run, boys...and now everyone will go our seperate ways in about 5 weeks' time.

Funny how 42 weeks seemed like an eternity when we first stepped into SAFTI/MI. All the turnouts, pumping, armskote sai kang, confinements, all came and passed. What's important were the lessons and what we've learnt...And all the friendships you may have forged. All the more better for me. OCS was when i really changed for the better, learned to think more maturely, learned how to treat people with respect. In hindsight, i think JC was like a Dark Age for me...but then again i had such a wonderful time there...Personal Dark Age. But it's also that time when youth really shows itself!

Not to say that you don't show your youth when you're in the army wearing green...It's all around in the army...IPPT. SOC. Drills. Outfield. They were insane, good fun where all we did was chiong and then have a few laughs after that. From Tekong to the jungles of LANCER and now the wide open plains of CRESCENDO...i had nothing but fun outfield. Maybe it's because the instructors won't touch you there. But it's also because i learned so much, saw so much more and applied everything in the classroom. Maybe JC should have been like this. I mean, who's going to appreciate polar equations unless you can see that it decided life and death in artillery?

So this is a memorial to the 55/04 OCC and the 43rd FAOCC/33rd BTACC. Pictures will be posted later...

And at artillery...A totally different culture where we learnt never to judge a book by its cover. Jamester looked ultimately evil at the beginning, but now we know who is truly evil now don't we? It's been an honour to be in X-Ray. To serve alongside my Delta friends as well as getting to know so many more interesting personalities and people. Beginning with SOCJOT @ LANCER, of course...the last days of Infantry where we spent 4 days lost in the jungles of LANCER...then all those cram sessions where the instructors tried to cram survey, FDM, Foxtrot Golf into us...followed by those dreaded Gunnery examinations which were so A-Level...can you all just imagine sitting in a lecture room for 3 hours mashing away at your calculator? That was Gunnery 1. The FA boys had Gunnery 2 and 3. Lucky them...haha...

We also had MILO and SAFARI...two outfields at Gunnery where we did observation as well as gun deployment, respectively. SAFARI was fun...if not tiring...we were tired and that was also where Julius started to show his ugly side...bah. Yes, Major Julius, need me to action front in 20 minutes? Yessir, yessir, 3 bags full. But the tekan side also made us function even closer as a team and forced us to work efficiently on the guns. Not to mention getting to visit all the deployment grounds around Singapore, live-firing a 81mm mortar (previously the FN MAG GPMG at Delta was the heaviest weapon ahaha) and also all the phoney fire missions!

Then we moved on to BTACC. EAGLE. RECCE. FIREBALL. Action Front took on a whole new meaning when we had to dash madly across the deployment grounds carrying power cables, camouflage nets, iron pickets, monkey rams, shouting at each other, but in the end this really jialat thing known as deployment drill did nothing but bring us together that much closer. How we began to realise and live with each other's weaknesses and strengths, and all the sweat, pumpings and frustrations brought us ultimately closer. 24 SA will be our next home, boys...hope to see you all there and have great fun! Away from that hellhole called Gunnery Training Wing.

Finally BATTLE KING. 'Nuff said!

I'm having the longest weekend EVER...like i feel like it's been 3 days since i came back home from CRESCENDO when i only landed yesterday...last night i went out with the boys...got Careful What You Wish For by Texas...quite feel-good...like they always play good music to just chill to. But they've got some really nice and catchy ones like Inner Smile...you've simply got to listen to it...it's so...catchy and dancey...

Also went bowling twice. Johnny told me to train up a totally new release with the Ace...which hopefully will play it like he does...all the way out with a vicious snap! into the pocket...with that absolutely-cool colour band formed by the finger-holds and thumb grip. I'm still working on it. Can't get the thumb out to cup the ball. I think it's psychological, but i do intend to get that release down pat on my inventory. Seeing John play helps in that he teaches me at first...then is willing to spot me...he gave me my Step One...as in the most fundamental release first before learning how to get the thumb out to cup...i think everything moves too quickly, so i don't get the release down right...Just got to train, train, train! Ziemlich einfach...not!

Lastly...memories as this year finally draws to a close. So many people, so many things have happened. Sadly, i lost touch with so many friends, but then ended up gaining my brothers and that much more. Be you near or far, just know this:

You touch my inner smile.

That was short. But if i wrote on...it's be...about another 5000 words and i doubt you'd have the patience to read...nor do i have the patience to write, either. hahaha...

Saturday, December 18, 2004

BATTLE KING - The Aftermath

Hallo ihr alle da draussen...so finally, i am back from BATTLE KING! No pictures for you all yet but i have to tell you that it was an absolutely fantastic and wild time over there in CRESCENDO. Okay, so it was freezing in the morning and pre-dawn hours. Okay, so we all got coated in dust during R&S phase. But in the mean time, it was crazy crazy fun!

Let's see. I kicked off BATTLE KING at the meteo side...basically we got more acquainted with the meteo system, did some live soundings (our very first!) in camp before moving outfield for 2 days of hectic frantic sounding. What's sounding? Basically, you blow up this huge balloon with helium gas and then tie a radiosonde to it. Once you have the right weight and everything's ready to go...(check: GPS stations, telemetry, bla bla...) you release it into the atmosphere, watch it race upwards and disappear into the deep blue azure skies. It's really therapeutic (psychologically, at least: read the entry made for EX EAGLE.) Also fooled around with the helium tanks and tried to sing the OCS song helium style...trying not to die of laughter, clutching at your lungs (helium makes them ache...ooooh....)

And also the visitors! The MO, ma'am Celine...so many people dropped by to hold a balloon, smile and release it into the sky. Took quite a few fotos myself too. See how they come out...because no one's sent them to me yet...haha...

Then, we went to the TPQ! Sleeping in the shelter....where it can become a sauna in the day...suffering man...bleargh...the highlight probably was getting my far stake stolen.....and also the night movement! First time i had to do it...and i managed it! -proud beam- hahaha.

Then it was the killer...R&S...Stands for Recce & Survey, for the uninitiated... But we mainly just did recce. Recced for grounds...got ostracized by the BnROs and BROs....got quite pissed at them too, but at least for one deployment, we went out and found grounds and they actually bought it. Now that, my friends, is an accomplishment...the other teams didn't manage to do that...ROs do their work with pride, i am proud to say...haha...But it also means a lot of map navigation, running the risk of getting lost in someone's plantation with the darkness closing in on you, frantically referring to your GPS, compass and map and trying to piece things together at the same time...it's stressful, to say the least.

The good part? The Thai drivers. Granted that we had to learn rudimentary Thai to communicate with them to turn left/right, straight ahead, reverse, wait, stop, U-turn, etc etc...but we also made some quite good friends with them. Johnny got to eat a fried red ants' nest....For me? Barbecued snake! And they do it good, gentlemen and ladies...think KFC without the oil...hwah.....To think it was roadkill. -.-

We also got to go up to the OPs and observe the rounds impact on the target area. You can hear the guns fire and the rounds whizzing above you...it's kinda unnerving at the OP already...wonder what if you were on the receiving end? whizz....white-hot pain...oblivion. Huh. Kinda sucky way to die, by artillery fire...

Also went to the guns to fire them! If a bullet is a head surrounded by a cartridge full of gunpowder, then artillery works the same, except that everything comes seperate. And that's no rifle too. Staring down the bore of the barrel, watching the smooth grooves cut into the inner bore...and when you pull the firing lever there's this earth-shaking concussion, the gun rocks back and one round shot away!

But from what i saw, the gunners spent a lot of time sleeping. Sigh. When we are working ourselves dead out there with R&S! sigh...

Oh, and the admin! Who could forget the wild buying at the canteen? Everything cheap everything good...haha...snagged some good deals meself. There's also this very interesting personality named Jenny...he/she sells food at the Sai Yok canteen...Go find out for yourselves!

BATTLE KING....apart from the xiong training...i never had so much fun since...i don't know! But it was fun and interesting...not just learning all the equipment and finding out how they performed live...but also, the many different facets of life in another land. Like...having herds of cattle walk right across your deployment ground. Little children waving at you in your Land Rover as you drive past. Driving along cultivated padi fields which are so wide open you can look left and right and not see where the field ends. Gazing into the night sky counting shooting stars. Struggling with Thai. These are experiences you will never find in Singapore...experiences which have enriched and made the BATTLE KING experience that much more enjoyable and memorable.

I think i'm eyeballed to go to meteo. I don't mind...if i don't go to CRESCENDO all the time, that is...

Sigh...BATTLE KING is over.

COMMISSIONING!

Also found out who my buddies were. You can really count on them to do stuff...pity to say that i couldn't really trust my group members that much...sigh...wonder if this should ever apply:

Though i walk the valley of death
I shall fear no evil
For thou art with me...

Friday, December 03, 2004

Im Flughafen todmuede wartend...

Hey you all...sitting in the airport departure lounge now, waiting for my flight to be called and for me to move to Gate C1...in about...20 minutes? Still got time lah. Just thought that penning down my final thoughts before i depart into the Great Unknown should be a novelty. Haha...I'm so dead tired now because i only grabbed a few hours' sleep for these 2 days...yet i doubt i'll nod off. BATTLE KING awaits! yadda yadda.

The next entry will be on the 18th December. Watch this space...Oh...i think someone is getting Once by Nightwish for me already...hahaha...any other generous souls? Sigh. All i want now is to get home safely and to enjoy Christmas in Singapore. And hopefully not too much rain in CRESCENDO. Rainy weather makes me crabby and impatient....

So here goes.

Excelsior!

Thursday, December 02, 2004

BATTLE KING | Mein neues Spiel | Abschied nehmen | Mehr zum Weihnachten!

Hallo ihr alle da draussen...heute ist es 2. Dezember, 2004...tonight i will be going to the airport to fly off for BATTLE KING. It will be 16 days of hot (and hopefully, dry) fun in CRESCENDO and hopefully all of us will come home safe and sound, on the 18th of December 2004 at 0315 hours. So here is BATTLE KING.

EX BATTLE KING: Gentlemen, this is what you have been trained for. BATTLE KING awaits just round the corner and whatever you have learned, wherever you may have gone, be it for the TPQ, FAMS, gunnery, GPO, BRO, FOs, or wherever else, here is where it all comes together. It is also a live firing exercise so do exercise caution and care whenever you fire. Lives count on it.

Sigh. But part of me still doesn't want to go to BATTLE KING, even if this is the grand finale of the FAOCC. It's like LANCER. I didn't want to go to SOCJOT at the last minute too. It's this fear of being thrown into an alien environment. I don't know how to explain it too. But it bugs me. Others look forward to BATTLE KING because after that there is only one thing left for us. Commissioning. I look forward to it too and i pray day and night for the day to come faster. I just don't know why i'm not looking forward to it yet. Perhaps i'll warm up when i actually land in CRESCENDO (when it's the cool season, ha, ha...) because then there'll be no turning back.

John came with me to bowl with the Ace yesterday and he said the ball is strong and doesn't look that bad at all, that it's quite cool for it to smell of root beer...but my game has to change. He says it's time for me to convert my release into more like him. So i altered my release now to only give the Ace a mild arc...and believe me it still crushes the pocket. Johnny says it's because the ball doesn't lose so much energy in the hook because my release is now just to let the ball drop off the fingers and not for me to intentionally rev the ball. Now i figured it out. When it's in the roll phase my ball is actually a tri-colour. Funky! Haha.

Now the revs are low so the ball doesn't hook much. Wait. technically, it's that the axis tilt of the revs are low. So it doesn't hook much but rather keeps most of the power for the pins. Wham! Wham! haha. Johnny says to slowly increase the axis tilt until i can play like him. I'm just waiting for the day when i consistently throw my Ace like he throws his Phenom. Make the ball snap. Slowly, but surely...just be patient.

Now, it's time for me to say goodbye to my friends. To all, i'll be gone for 16 days til the 18th. 16 days is a long time. Please take care of yourselves and let no harm come to you as i will do my best for myself. Let's all come home and celebrate Christmas together, okay?

Wishlist! I also want...

1. Nightwish - Once.

Until the return...